Often we are upset with a situation or a person(s) thinking how we have been hurt or inconvenienced and hopelessly blaming them for all that has happened or is happening to us. During that time, we prefer to remain in the company of people who sympathize with us, unknowingly fanning our ego. As we wallow in our thoughts pandering to our ego we are actually hurting ourselves and allowing the feelings to harden which eventually finds a permanent place in our body indirectly sowing the seeds for a future illness. In reality, everything happens with our consent in response to the needs that we have, its just that we are not aware. In my view, our ego self prevents us from reaching out to our inner self for a complete 360 degree understanding of every situation allowing us to be judgmental. Just like a Lotus which appears equally beautiful from all angles and unfolds itself bit by bit, our inner self also reveals itself when we are on the path to recognize, understand and accept 360 degrees of every situation.
In the past, I have often blamed others for something that happened to me or something that did not happen as expected until the inner awareness was kindled, which led to unconditional acceptance of every event in my life. One of my spiritual teachers once mentioned that the best way to deal with a perceived unpleasant situation is to immediately guide the mind to think of 3 positive things about the person or situation. As we start thinking positively, the pain and anger slowly subsides, our vibrations improve and we begin to understand and accept. I found it difficult at first but after a few months of conscious practice, I actually realized that I was doing it all the time in every situation at home, on the road, in the office, in the super market, waiting in queue and everything seemed to be just right. I call this “Awareness 360 Degree” Practice and I apply it to every situation not stopping at 3 but continuing to the extent I can. This shifts our focus from being judgmental to one of empathy and love. Here is an example from my personal experience:
I have a friend who worked in a senior position at a financial services company. There were numerous occasions when I requested him to give me a tip or two on investing in equity which would fetch me good returns. Every time, he tactfully avoided my request but assured me of inclusion in some email group which was privy to some tip and information about the market. Unfortunately, he never did and at some point I gave up after repeated asking. However, I was disappointed and hurt that he never wanted me to earn handsomely on equity or he simply said something with no intention of actually doing it for me while he had done it for others. When I started my “Awareness 360 Degree” Practice I could resolve this dissension in my mind. As I rolled out the list…. that he genuinely forgot, he did not want me to risk my hard earned money since he cared, he was just being polite and diplomatic since he could not say a direct no, it could have led to a conflict with his work place responsibilities, I could have reminded again, this is the way it was meant to be etc etc the small pebbles of hurt slowly dissolved and I was awash with deep peace and calm. Earlier I was judging from my position but now I was empathizing from his, viewing the entire transaction neutrally and it all seemed fair and right.
Try this practice whenever you are feeling low and watch how you start feeling better and the mood instantly elevated.